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Katie, with Caroline (Kangaroo Style), in the Santa Barbara Courthouse

Today I unveiled a new private blog to Katie that will consist of and catalogue a collection of my future love notes to her, a sort of online book of notes to my bride. Here was my description of the site:

This is my book of love notes to Katie, at least as of her 29th year. A few months ago, Caroline was born. A few days ago, Piper was hunting for our socks. We have a good family.

This morning I was writing a note to Katie, which is something I have not done very much of late. I was considering the tension between the ease of writing such words with the infrequency of actually doing it. Today I am nearing the conclusion of a period in our marriage when I didn’t pursue Katie very much. I know that I have not pursued her well. She knows that too. Also, I am arrogant, self-righteous, and angry. Yet, Katie loves me. Very much. In this way, her marriage to me and love for me realizes the mission of marriage: to represent the love of God, to be a vision of Christ in my life. I love Katie very much.

I love her, but I don’t write her. I was thinking how I want to write her something every day. Something textual that would serve as a reminder, more than a reminder, a profession of my love. I thought about always keeping my stationary and pen with me; however, it took a mere nanosecond to realize that this would last maybe half of a week. I then entertained the idea of just consistently writing her a note every morning with my stationary safe at home. Then, I remembered that “consistency” is not always a friend I love and that I also don’t like writing notes when Katie is home. It is like wrapping a present in front of the receiver. Tacky.

What I needed was something convenient in time and location. I wanted a solution that would allow me to write whenever, wherever. So often I think of writing Katie when I don’t have anything to write on or write with. Such is our time. I always have connection to the internet; however, a simple pen and paper often evade me. So, this was partly a choice of convenience; however, it was mostly a choice of necessity, for otherwise, I would not consistently write my bride.

There was, however, thought of other perks. As easily as I can write my love notes, Katie can read them. Whenever. Wherever. (Assuming she has a computer and internet connection, of course. Still, this beats a box under the bed). Also, this allows a timeline, each note stacked upon the one before. My hope is that years from now, Katie will occasionally choose peruse past entries in this online book of love notes and be reminded and encouraged through the progression of our love and life together.



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